One thing that can happen when you grow up in an abusive environment is that you develop a sort of allergy to hostility. Even amounts that would be considered normal can set you off, spiking feelings of disgust. You may well end up being kind of a pushover, as you're good at adapting and you have an inner need to stay away from meanness.

You actually see this as a strength, but others will typically see it as a weakness, unless they happen to see the wisdom (or a benefit to them) in that instance. Now, their reception doesn't mean you are a total pushover. In some situations, you may be exactly the opposite. The abusive environment likely taught you survival and defense skills, yet you can navigate others' "drama" - inconveniences, ignorances, or hostilities - with a kind of aikido that makes it look like you aren't doing much, because you aren't doing the things people usually do that make situations worse (often these are attempts to fix things in ways that simply won't work). You may be very capable of holding your own in a fight. It's just that you are considerably less willing to go there even than most normal people raised well. You associate hostility with the badness of your upbringing. You don't want to be the bad guy. You want to be the opposite of the bad guy.

This temperament is, like so many things, a strength and a weakness. People around you often benefit from the strength without realizing it; or they may realize and compliment you on your balance, gentleness, etc. But they may not like it when the other shoe drops and you show some understanding toward someone they feel is their enemy (or in some important way opposing them), or when your matter-of-factness (you are so practiced at not trying to be hurtful that you know you are not trying that, but they may not know that even after knowing you for years) ends up hurting their feelings.

One of the best things you can do to maximize the strength and minimize the weakness is to read about assertiveness and work on that. You already have many of the elements of skillful assertiveness, but you probably aren't putting them quite in the right order.