I... am not, partly because I learned from her - the very hard way - how delusions work, the ways they cannot be corrected (even though you think that should really work), and how to make sure you are not being delusional yourself.
If you want to help a delusional person see better, do not - do NOT, really truly DO NOT - attack them. They will not gain a single thing from that except that you do not like them or have their best interests in mind. Attack them and they will trust you 0% and discard or discredit everything you say. That's a lot of how delusions work. You even have to be super careful sometimes when you think you're being innocent. Even simple, mild, friendly contradictions can trigger delusional people.
And - I should say again - basically everyone has delusions. But some of us know how to hunt them down.
The Republican Party today is a political party made up of people who are more susceptible to delusions than others. This does not mean that the Democratic Party has no trouble of its own with delusions.
But I think one thing we can all learn is that politics and delusions are closely connected. Many of the things we feel most strongly about are based on intangibles, hearsay, the preferences and rhetoric and assumptions of our peer group, and so on. We feel strongly - we feel so valiant about feeling strongly - to make up for the fact we don't actually fucking know.
This is one of the absolute core dynamics in, and problems with, politics. We get super worked up about stuff we don't actually know. Not in every single case; some people out there do know some things for sure. But if you see someone worked up, chances are they don't actually know. They are making many, many, many assumptions. Maybe they're partly right, and they're taking the evidence of partial rightness as a blank check to spew a lot of other stuff that just sounds right to them at the time.
Don't we all do this? I might be doing this myself right now. Hm. But the thing is, I do have a process. It's something I've worked very hard to develop and hone.
It depends on getting willing to doubt yourself and others and feel uncomfortable but not defensive (in other words, be vulnerable) and look for the real, solid, factual common ground and go from there, cautiously. If you're preoccupied with anyone's confidence or how you look, that's getting in the way. Put solid facts front and center, doubt them anyway, and build out from the least dubious ones, remembering that you're kinda guessing but in an educated way. It sounds shifty, but it's the best process. Seek information, facts, expertise. Don't be egotistical about it. Don't assume you know better than anyone else. Don't go down twenty rabbit holes and think what you've pieced together must be right because you're special for the twenty rabbit holes. The world is made of facts. Start with facts, but vet them. Use your imagination. Play. Discuss. Keep returning to facts. Don't dismiss things out of hand. Pay attention to inconvenient arguments that annoy you. Those are often gold, even when they aren't ultimately sound arguments. The fact you're annoyed and don't have a great answer and you want to get dismissive is a red flag. Don't be like that. Learn more, instead. Thank the argument that made you want to dismiss it because, if you're honest, you actually felt kind of bested for a second. Whether that point is right or wrong, it challenged you. Pay homage to that by learning more.
It's something I learned from talking to my mother: how not to be delusional.
And we are not taught this in school, apparently. Nor is it emphasized in politics.
It really should be, though, because politics is rife with inflamed feelings in search of evidence.
If we could, as a culture, as a species, as a globe, learn to hunt down each other's and our own delusions and bring them to light in the most helpful, compassionate way, many problems that seemed unsolvable before might begin to go away.
It's a hope. That's the best I've got right now.
